As you can clearly see by the title, this play on words post is about sex and wait for it…. babies shock.
So first of all, apologies to anyone I know well that may find this a little too intimate. It is a subject I have been meaning to discuss for a while now. Mostly because, it has been one of the biggest strains on my relationship.
I mean let’s be serious here, sex is one of the most important factors of a partnership, I would go as far as saying it’s top three. The main difference between a friendship and relationship is sex right?
Being quite a new couple, we had a healthy sex life and if I’m being completely honest I don’t think we invested as much time and thought as we could have, we missed out a large chunk of the “getting to know you stages”. You know what I mean, the can’t keep your hands off one another, adventurous, sparks flying type of love.
And then before you know it, we are introducing life into the world. Sex got pushed to the bottom of the pile of priorities quite quickly. Of course, we are still attracted to each other and the love is there. That hasn’t changed one bit, but I have. My body, my mind, I have suddenly become this stranger and I don’t recognise myself.
I didn’t want to be touched, I felt uncomfortable and ugly in my own body. I hated how pregnancy made me look and even worse how it made me feel. This took a toll on my relationship from the very beginning, the intimacy between us was almost nonexistent. I’m referring to just the little things like cuddling, kissing and affection. I just couldn’t fathom the thought of being in contact with another person, and in my head all I could think was why would he want to touch me like this?
Nine long months.
We couldn’t have done anything different, pregnancy just didn’t agree with me. That so called “glow” that’s meant to appear, well it never turned up to the party.
And we can’t forget the amount of people that tell you it will bring on labour. When you are so incredibly done with being a heavy, uncomfortable mess, you will try almost anything to get things going. It’s not great though is it… Let’s be honest about it, you do it for an ulterior motive and you probably don’t enjoy any part of it. All you can think is, will this work?
I guess what I’m trying to say here is, when it feels like you have lost that spark, that truly magical feeling of love between two, remember it’s only temporary and remember that’s all it will ever be. It exists, it’s just buried deep under a bed of mixed emotions, all you have to do is start fresh with a new set.